Monday, November 21, 2005
an idea to change your life
It is widely believed that one of the keys to a successful life is to set up goals for yourself. Friends’ Phoebe Buffay had a list of goals, which included among others, having the perfect kiss and meeting Portuguese people. There’s a movie called “10 things to do before you turn 30”. I haven’t seen it but I do have a contribution to the list. One I recommend highly for anyone, at any age. It’s simpler than climbing Mount Everest, although almost as nerve racking. It’ll change your perspective of some of the most mundane things of life and on the whole, it’s rather fun.
I suggest unemployment.
We may not realise this but most of us have been constantly busy with something or the other pretty much since the age of 3. With all respect to the “childhood is the best time of your life” view holders, we all know that school was no child’s play. Every summer vacation came with holiday homework and preparation for the next year. Having barely heaved a sigh of relief at finishing our board exams, it was time for us to start jostling our way into colleges. CAT, RAT, GMAT followed that and before we knew it we were eating tasteless catered food at our workplaces, while partaking in office gossip. It’s been a busy ride and stopping isn’t a thought that occurs to most people. I confess, being out of work wasn’t exactly a lifelong dream of mine either. But having stumbled into this blissful, shall we say, experience I feel compelled to urge everyone to take a shot at it.
Now enjoying unemployment is kinda like taking to caviar. It’s an acquired taste. (And also very expensive, but then all good things are.) The first week is rather hellish. You are so used to constantly running, and running late, that waking up to nothingness will be very disconcerting. At this time, I guarantee you, there will nothing to watch on TV, nothing interesting to read around the house and the electricity will go off for at least 4 hours at a stretch. You will pick up the phone to reconnect with old friends now that you have the time but guess what? They’re still busy and will have to call you back please! After half heartedly organising your socks drawer you’ll decide to catch up on all those lost zzzs and fall asleep. When you wake up, it’ll be dark outside and you’ll find yourself still in your pyjamas; unbathed and disoriented. Your friends will finally call you back and tell you about the crazy day they had at work and in return you’ll tell them about today’s Oprah. As you hang up the phone, a deep depression will start enveloping your heart and you’ll find your hand reaching out for that head hunter’s card.
STOP! These are just early obstacles designed to test if you’re strong enough to be an ‘unemployed person’. Like I said, it’s not all a bed of roses but if you survive the first week I promise, it will get better.
The feeling of joy starts creeping around the first weekend of your jobless life. Around Sunday evening, you’ll hear your friends saying no to another drink, instead groaning and moaning about the upcoming Monday. Hmm…you’ll think to yourself, what do I have lined up for Monday morning? Ah yes, I was going to organise my t-shirts by colour. And the deadline on that is…September 2010.
Yeah, I think I will have another drink. And maybe after that catch a late movie on TV. But I won’t make it too late. I must, after all get that very important job of washing my hair done tomorrow. Open planner. Things to do - Monday: Switch geyser on.
As your second week of wastefulness unfolds you’ll find yourself settling into a happy routine. Wake up around noon, potter around house, check mail, shower (or not. Unemployed life is very lenient when it comes to hygiene.) and step out for a bit of something.
In the past one week I have done things that a job just would not have afforded me time for.
I started with a refreshing facial. Oops, I’ve mentioned that already. Well, let’s just leave it at, I started with an interesting visit to the salon.
After that I caught a play. An Agatha Christie murder mystery it was, enacted rather amateurishly but at least something culturally driven in my otherwise shallow life.
I read Lolita by Vladimir Nabakov, a book so beautifully written that I felt too humbled for a long time to even write my little blog.
I went for a kalaripayattu dance class. That’s a beautiful but very vigorous style of Kerela martial arts. You don’t just stretch your body to crazy limits but also learn to smilingly lose all your dignity as professional dancers cartwheel around you (who’re learning how to kick one foot above the ground).
I went to see ‘Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire’. A thoroughly enjoyable film, which is apparently partially inspired by Bollywood! Watch out for the cutie who plays Cedric Diggory and a really creepy, really awesome Voldemort. Personally, I think ‘Prisoner of Azkaban’ is the best of the Harry Potter films, but this one was really good as well.
Through all this, I’ve played lots of Su-doku, tended to my plants, made a scrap book of my Pondicherry pictures, checked out a new night club, been to party that got raided by cops, caught up with some old girlfriends and forgotten a really really good friend’s birthday (NM: Happy Belated Birthday! Please forgive me for not calling. Believe me when I tell you I had totally lost track of time. Sorry :-( )
Now for any of you have even slightly bought into the great unemployed life concept, I do have some words of caution. As lovely as it is, it does come with an expiry date. I suggest you give it three weeks top. Either that or make sure you never check your bank balance. Cuz when you do, a sense of panic will start setting in. And you’ll start coming up with bizarre money making schemes in case you never get a job. So before I have to start putting any of these crazy ideas into practice, if you know of anyone who needs an advertising copywriter with 4 and something years of work ex, ask them to get in touch. Please.
Posted by that girl in pink
| 7:39 pm
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11 comments
11 Comments
- at 11:03 am lemontree said...
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hi pink
well written. was in splits.
and having been there done that i could realte to every bit of it
-the initial depression, the settling in and the expiry date.
above all i love the feeling of calm that sets in- like everything did not have to be done yesterday - actually can be done tommorrow- its like you are no longer running a day late in your life
warning: it can be addictive
and good luck with NM . I forgot last year cause i was running a day late on everything and she wasn't pleased
- at 12:55 pm said...
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U never did call me... infact when I called you, u said u were busy
: (
Anyway, m buying into ur 'unemployment' scheme...it seems as though no job manages to interest me enough!
Sre
- at 7:06 pm said...
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hey pink,
beautifully articulated encouragement especially for the day dreamer variety..
to take your point a bit further, i've discovered this really nice way to be unemployed and it comes with no expiry date really..or perhaps that date is too far off into the future to really give it any serious thought..have a baby! when i had mine, a year back, of course the initial days of getting used to waking up 15 times in the night was hard, but ever since i got used to it, its blisss..no stupid managers to report to..no running and gasping for breath, and no need to think about the bank balance because u know, when you have a legitimate reason, even the hubby wont complain about working extra hard.. :)
wicked na?
- at 9:57 pm that girl in pink said...
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Lemontree: i know! it is addictive. if it wasn't for that small issue of money for imp stuff like eating and shopping, i think "unemployment" would've been a top career option!
Sre: I've stopped calling my friends cuz they're always busy. but i take yr hint & will be ugging you very soon!
RJ: At first read your plan seemed flawless. on further examination though i found a small but significant problem. Being a mother is a full-time job! Can't think of anything tougher or more important and it totally goes against the very pillar of laziness this plan is developed on. don't u think?
- at 7:01 am said...
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pink, yeah, that's true, but at least you dont have the various 'sans' ruling your life na.. ;-) and let me tell you from experience (ahem, sounding big- sisterly,) (and after being a workaholic for 14 long years,) this job is far better!!
peace.
- at 2:52 pm Sangeeta said...
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Three great reasons for you to stay unemployed: 1. You're writing hysterically well. (For the record, much better than I remember. But I'm hurtling towards 34, my memory's shot to pieces anyway.) 2. You're going through many, many posts without a mention of the 'w' word. 3. You get to watch Oprah!
- at 6:59 pm sinusoidally said...
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Maybe amongst all the wonderful things you can do when unemployed one of them should include retouching your resume!
It is not that bad...enjoy it while it lasts! And it was quite funny reading your post!
- at 8:22 pm lemontree said...
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pink- where the hell have u disappered from blogworld? why? and when you back?
waiting
- at 12:46 pm said...
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Boss,
you've stopped blogging + your mobile is always "unreachable"... wot's up? I tried calling you back that day...it rang incessantly and thereafter I kept/keep getting the " number unreachable" voice over! Sometimes that Airtel chick also informs that i am dialing an "invalid number". Pray explain what the matter is.
Sre
- at 11:06 am said...
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Hello Girl in Pink,
I am a regular reader of your blogs (though not a regular commentator!)...was wondering when the next blog's coming up? It's been a long time!
- at 5:01 am said...
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lemontree said...
said...